Everything was dark, but I could hear the muffled voices of people trying to keep quiet. There was a wave of shushing moving around, and then, “Surprise!” everyone yelled as the blindfold was pulled off. I was surrounded by all my friends, some acquaintances, and a few strangers. A banner hung from the ceiling saying “Farewell Ross” in big gold letters.

“It’s for you man, it’s all for you,” my friend Stephen said. “We’re going to miss you, but until that time, let’s celebrate that you’re getting the fuck out!” There was a loud cheer from the crowd and everyone took a drink. A bottle was thrust in my hand and I followed without looking at it. It tasted kinda funny and I looked down. Sake? Who swigs a bottle of sake?

I knew something would be coming, I was leaving the country after all, but figured we’d gather in someone’s basement like we always did. Instead we were in a penthouse suite on the twenty fourth floor of the swanky hotel The Blutschloss; five living rooms, three bathrooms, two bedrooms, a balcony with a bar, and a rooftop patio. They pulled out all the stops for this. I wove my way through the crowd, taking shots with people, cheering drinks, hugging and hi-fiving. My hand never seemed to be empty. I don’t know who was watching, but it seemed as soon as I put an empty drink down, a full one was thrust in my hand.

There were a lot of familiar faces there, people I’d shared rides with as well as shots, people I’d made drunken business plans with at three in the morning over a bottle of vodka and a joint, people I’d slept with and we casually ignored each other in school the next day. People I wouldn’t recognize without a beer in their hand. But there were only two people important to me that I hadn’t seen yet, Andy and Ben. Andy was usually the one that showed up when you were drunk and ready for a life talk, so she was probably hiding somewhere. Ben was usually the one pressuring me to do more shots, I thought he’d be at the front of the line when the blindfold came on.

Someone stopped me, a young kid that looked like someone’s brother. “Hey man, I heard you’re a legend when it comes to chugging. Can we see it in action?” He handed me a bottle of beer.

I took it and poured it into a glass, making sure to get it nice and foamy. He looked horrified at what I was doing so I explained, “It’s important to get out as much of the carbonation as possible. Trust me, it’s part of the process. Now we’re going to have to wait a couple minutes for that to flatten out some more. Whose brother are you?”

“Erik’s,” the kid said to me.

“I haven’t seen him here yet, is he around? What’s he doing these days?”

“Couldn’t make it tonight, said he had some important business downtown to take care of. But he’s going to come by later he hopes. He’s working for some company, doesn’t say much about it. He always has to go somewhere for ‘business’ and disappears for a couple days.”

“Your brother is a weird guy. Hey, watch this beer for a bit, I gotta find someone.”

I walked around until I saw her across the room, Andy. She caught my eye and made a b-line towards me smiling, a general air of happiness about her. We stopped and stood in front of each other, staring into each others eyes, holding the moment, remembering all the memories we’d shared together since grade school, and all the things we’d forgotten. She leaned in and hugged me, whispered in my ear that she was happy, really, truly happy for me and was excited for whatever came next in my life. “Everything you’ve done has lead you here. It sounds cheesy, but your heart has lead you here. Look around you, all these people,” she caught the eye of Erik’s brother behind me. “All right, well most of these people – they’re all here for you.”

We pulled apart and I mouthed Thank You. She kept smiling, looking like she was about to tear up, but I stopped her. “Hey now, there’ll be plenty of time for that later. Right now we’re here to celebrate and have a good time. So come on, take this shot with me. A toast to the memories we have, and the ones we’ve forgotten – including probably most of tonight.”

I grabbed two shot glasses and the closest bottle of Jameson – two Jambo’s coming up. We cheered to the past, the future, and the space between them.

“Listen,” she said as I poured another shot. “I have something else to talk to you about, it’s important. Don’t worry it’s good news,  it can wait ‘till later. It’s good. It will be good. One more and then I have to find a bathroom.”

I gritted my teeth against the burning aftertaste. “Oh, have you seen Ben around? I haven’t seen him at all tonight. He is here isn’t he?”

“Of course he is, he planned it all. I’ve seen him around. It’s like one of those sitcoms where you each keep missing each other. If I see him again I’ll tell him to stay put. Bathroom time.” She took one more shot and sauntered off, a bit more of a wobble in her step now.

I found Erik’s brother and his cohorts right behind me, like they’d been shadowing me making sure I didn’t wander off and deny them a show. “Well boys, as promised, but first, how about a little more competition. I’ve got this full pint here, you’ve got whatever you have left in your bottles – you each have at least half I see. We start at the same time, and if one of you beats me I’ll give you the rest of this bottle of whisky.” They stared at it in reverence, like it was a sacred object. “Here we go. One…two…three…go!”

We all started chugging, or rather they started chugging as one usually does with a bottle of beer, big gasping mouthfuls as it glug, glug, gluged out of the bottle. I lifted my glass to my mouth and tipped it back, pouring the beer down my throat. Three second flat. I slammed the glass down in victory while they stared at me.

“The trick is to open your throat, then it’s just like pouring it on the floor, it goes right down. But hey, I’m not a sore winner, take the bottle.” I tossed one of them the bottle, he fumbled and almost dropped it. “Enjoy the night, enjoy the friendship, enjoy the memories.”

The night started to get hazy as I wandered from group to group, accepting shots, drinks, and one more chugging competition. Over time the conversations died down; the questions about where I was going and what I was doing next, the endless explanations, people listening as if they cared, but it wasn’t going to affect them in any way. The next day it would all be another story to tell their friends, the time the partied in a hotel loft with that guy they saw in the halls sometimes. I didn’t mind, I preferred it, I just wanted them all to have a good time without worrying about the nicities of why we were there.

I saw Andy again at one point. She asked me if I had time to talk, that there was still something really important that she wanted to say to me, and could we go somewhere private. I wasn’t there though, that wasn’t my mindset. I was passed the point of those drunken heart to heart talks, I just wanted to pump my fist, scream, yell, break something – not out of anger, just energy that needed to be released. I wanted to sing and jump around, exude my excitement until I was exhausted.

Fine. She huffed off, frustrated with me. She said something to the effect of hoping she saw me again before I left so that she could tell me, if she decided to. Her words hurt a bit, but as much as my own attitude was being fueled by alcohol and drugs, hers was too. She was always the type to have those heart to hearts late at night. If I didn’t black out I’d find her later and we’d have our drunken talk.

I needed to get some fresh air. And where the hell was Ben? That asshat should have found me by now. This was my party, I wasn’t the one that should be going around hunting people out.

I heard a rumour that not only was there the big wrap around balcony, but we also had roof access. I went on to the balcony and found a set of stairs that lead up to the roof, which wasn’t the roof at all but another larger patio. It was up there that I finally found Ben, standing and admiring the view of the city and parks below, a single drink in his hand.

“Hey man, what the hell’s up?” It was taking a great amount of focus to keep my words from slurring too much. The cool air was helping. I took a couple of slow deep breaths to calm myself and set my mind a little straighter. I was still drunk, but at least everything else had stopped moving. “They took that blindfold off of me two or three hours ago and I’m just finding you now? Where have you been, hiding up here this whole time? I thought you were going to be the first to do a shot with me.”

Ben turned and walked towards me. He was dressed in a suit, a proper fitting one, and nursing the single drink in his hand. He walked slowly, calmly, soberly. This wasn’t like him – he should be more blasted than I was right now.

“I wanted to be there, maybe I should have,” he said. “But for once, and this might surprise you when I say it, I didn’t want the party to be about me; loud, boisterous, taking all the attention. This party is for you, I’m glad to see you’re having fun.”

He was standing right in front of me. There was an anger that had built up inside me, a frustration like he had been dodging me all night. But it all dissipated when he stood there. A smile broke out on my face. “It is a good time, thank you. You’re giving me a proper send off. But still, this is how it’s always been; you and me and Andy, the dynamic trio. We’re floundering down there without you. Almost like that one party we went to, about six months ago, remember that? We got that call from Tom saying he was going to have a party but we rolled up late. Everything seemed quiet, the lights were low, no music. We thought it’d been cancelled or broken up and no one told us. We came in the door and there were maybe ten people sitting around in the room casually talking, being real boring. We got in there and kicked it up, next thing we knew the stereo was blaring, we’re doing shots, cheering, we crowed surfed that one guy in the living room and almost broke the table when we dropped him. We turned it around.”

“Oh wow, only six months ago and it’s already fading, being replaced by so many other awesome memories. Like that one night in May four years ago –“

“-We’re not talking about that night,” I cut him off. “That one can fade permanently. But come on man, we need you down there. Andy is pissed at me again and you gotta help patch it up before I go. So take a shot of this and let’s get going.” I handed him a bottle.

“What is this?” He took it and looked it over.

“I have no idea, someone handed it to me and I’ve been taking swigs for about half an hour. Tastes like burning.”

“This is a bottle of Jack Daniels. Come on, we’re better than this. We’re better than Jack. Let’s drink some of this instead.” He pulled out a different bottle, was it the coveted… “That’s right, I’ve been saving it for a special occasion. What better night than tonight?”

I was about to turn and head back to the party when Ben stopped me. “There’s actually one more thing I wanted to talk to you about.”

“You and Andy need to get your watches synched up. Now isn’t the time for drunken reminiscing or heartfelt confessions. That window isn’t even open yet, you need to wait until the novices have passed out or gone home and we’re the scant few who are left and still ready to go. Find me in another hour and we’ll see how the party is going then.” I turned back around to head for the stairs but he grabbed me by the shoulder and spun me around.

“No, it’s exciting, another aspect of the party you don’t know about yet.”

He had my interest. I took the bottle from him and took a swig. I never got used to the burn. “All right, I’m listening.”

“Okay great. There is a bit of a preamble but bare with me, it’ll be worth it.” He was getting excited, more animated as he talked. “Well, this has always been kind of our thing right? The one thing we’re really good at?”

“What?”

“Partying! It’s the one thing that we’re really good at, that we enjoy the most. At least for me, the times that I’ve felt most alive, when I’ve been having the most fun, when nothing else in the world mattered, was when we were in the throws of a good party. Am I wrong? Think about that. Think about what it would be like for the party to never stop. Instead of just on weekends, what if we got to hang out with our best friends every night, blasted our favourite music every night, get drunk and hi-five and have fun every night?”

I guess he had a point. It was a lot of fun, and one of the things we were most consistent with, but it was just us getting drunk and letting off steam at the end of the week, what was he getting at? “What, you want to do this professionally or something? I don’t know if that’s a thing. At least not in the way you’re thinking.”

“No, not like a job, that’d make it boring again. That would make it work. I’m talking about a never-ending party. This,” he motioned to all the people downstairs on the lower balcony, the people inside, everyone talking and drinking and having fun. “This all the time.”

This is the kinda drunk I was at. The big and exciting planning phase where everything seemed possible. Talking to your best friend and getting jacked up about the screenplay you’re going to write together, or the business you’re going to create, or the bar you’re going to open. The future held so many possibilities and they all seemed within reach with a tiny bit of effort. “Yes!” I yelled. “Yes, hells yes! I am here for this. What’s your plan? Open a bar? I already have a name; we could call it The Falcons Nest. What do you think?”

He was smiling. “That’s great, I’m glad you’re on board. I think there’s already a place with that name, but it doesn’t matter. I’m not talking about opening a bar, I’m talking about a party, this party. We can do it forever.” He was losing me again so I let him keep going. “All right, a bit more of a long winded explanation, but follow me along. This building isn’t like normal buildings. It was designed by Dimitri Levchenko, who was a known occultist and some people say he had direct ties to the underworld; Hades, Hell, the Devil, Satan – whatever you want to call them, Levchenko built this building as a way of calling directly to them.”

He took a swig from the bottle and passed it to me, then he pulled out a small book from his pocket. “And it’s said that if you stand atop the balcony like we are now, in this spot, and say a particular incantation,” he opened the book and said a a few lines and snapped it closed. “And then offer a sacrifice, your wish – whatever it may be – will be granted. And I wish that this party would never stop, that it’d keep repeating day after day, night after night, so that we could have fun forever.”

I took a swig from the bottle and smiled. He was always one for theatrics. “You forgot one step Ben, the sacrifice. You want me to pull up some chairs and we can throw them over the balcony?” I looked around for some patio furniture.

“It’s going to take something a little bigger than that to complete this wish, I just hope it works.” He stood up on the ledge and looked over. What was happening? My drunken mind suddenly became clear, instinct kicked in, and I ran towards him, but it was too late. He turned around, smiled, and fell backwards.

I reached the balcony and looked over, I could make out the image of his body twenty five floors down on the sidewalk. I screamed after him, my mind reeling and looking to just act and see what happened, what would work. But there was nothing. Nothing could be done now.

I ran to the stairs and started taking them two at a time to the lower balcony. I missed the last couple, tripped, and hit my head on the ground and blacked out.

I could hear voices, muffled, like they were trying to be quiet. A blindfold was pulled off and everyone surrounding me yelled, “Surprise!” I was back at the beginning of the party. “It’s for you man, it’s all for you,” my friend Stephen said. “We’re going to miss you, but until that time, let’s celebrate that you’re getting the fuck out!” That didn’t make sense though, I’d already done all this before…hadn’t I?

I wandered around the party in a daze, saying hi to people, accepting drinks and hugs and well wishes. A young kid stopped me and asked me if the stories were true about how fast I could chug a beer and could he see it. I looked at him. “You’re Erik’s brother aren’t you?”

“Yeah, how’d you know?”

“You have a similar face. Pour that beer into a glass and I’ll be back in ten minutes.”

I saw Andy from across the room, locked eyes with her. We met in the middle and she hugged me and whispered in my ear. “That’s great Andy, I’m happy for you. But didn’t you already tell me that? Didn’t we already do this? What…what happened?”

“What are you talking about?” She asked.

“This, all this,” I motioned to the party around us. “Didn’t we already have this party?”

“Yeah we get it, we should have had a series of parties leading up, is that it? One party isn’t good enough? Fuck Ross, there are other things in life you know.” She walked off in a huff.

I needed to find Ben.

I passed Erik’s brother as I made my way to the balcony. “Hey man, ready to show us that skill.”

I didn’t give any preamble, just grabbed the glass and chugged it down in one go. It was still a bit carbonated and coughed a bit, but kept it down. “Your brother, he’s downtown on business is he? Any idea what he does?”

“Nah man, you know how he can be. I’ll tell him what a party he missed though.”

“Yeah, you do that.”

I found the stairs leading up to the second balcony and went up. Sure enough Ben was there. He looked ecstatic to see me. “All right Ross, I can see that you’re a bit confused, but let me assure you that everything is going to be okay.” He was grinning from ear to ear, almost giddy. “It worked. I thought it would, but it’s always one of those things that you’re never really sure until it happens. But here we are. It worked.”

I grabbed him by his jacket collar. “What the hell is going on here? I’ve been to this party already, they made the surprise, I talked to Andy, chugged a beer with Erik’s brother. And now I’m doing it all again.”

“Remember what I was telling you when we were up here? About the nature of this building, and the man who designed it? I made a wish that we could have a never ending party. That we would be here every night forever – reliving this amazing time.”

“What the fuck are you talking about?” I wanted to throw him off the balcony myself. But he did that himself already. But he’s standing right here in front of me but…

“The last time, when I jumped, that was the sacrifice. So now we get to have this night forever. Look at us; surrounded by all our friends, all this alcohol, music, food. We can do whatever we want here, have fun all night, and then do it all again, and again, and again. The fun is literally never going to stop.”

“That’s insane!” I yelled at him. “We can’t do that. We have lives to live. I’m leaving in three days. I’ll stop you this time, I won’t let you do it.”

“If only that were an option, but it’s already happened. We’re in a bubble now, ever repeating. The rest of the world is moving on, but we’re here forever. Go take a look over the balcony there.”

I walked over and looked down. It was true. Twenty four floors down I could just make out the red speck that was his body lying on the pavement. He was dead. But he was here. But…but…but…

“I know it’s a lot to take in,” Ben said. “I mean, I’m almost freaking out at the possibility myself, and I did it. But I think after a couple of parties we’ll find our rhythm, and everything will be great.” I could feel myself swaying, my mind getting foggy. I was trying to hold on but I could feel it slipping. “It’s all right Ross, we can pick this up again next time. I’ll find you. We’re the only ones that know the truth, everyone else will think it’s the first time again. Just think of the fun we can have.”

The world spun around, I could feel my eyes roll into the back of me head, then everything went black.

“Surprise!” They pull off the blindfold.

I didn’t waste any time, I wasn’t interested in maintaining a social norm here. I wanted to get out. How to get out? How to get out? How can I get out? I found Erik’s brother, didn’t say anything, just grabbed one of the beers and started chugging it. Not my usual style of waiting for it to settle. I don’t know why, my mind frantic and looking for something to hold on to.

“Hey we heard you were a fast chugger, is that all you’ve got?” Erik’s brother chided me.

“I haven’t got the time to chug properly.” I said. “I need to get out of here.”

“So leave, the door is right there.”

The door. It was so simple it seemed almost laughable. If I could get out, get far enough away, that would…I didn’t know exactly. Burst the bubble maybe? It had to work. Something had to work.

I started walking towards the door when I ran into Andy. “Hey, where are you going? I’ve been looking for you. I’ve got some exciting news to tell you.” She reached around me for a hug but I pushed her off.

“Sorry, I don’t have time right now. I’ve got to get out of here.”

“Get out, what are you talking about? This is your party, you can’t leave.”

“If it’s my party then I’ll do what I want.”

“Hey what the fuck is your problem…” she started to say, but I had already turned my back to her and was heading for the door.

Everything was moving so quickly. My heart was racing, my breathing was erratic. I needed to calm down, focus, think. Out in the hallway it seemed like a regular hotel, complete with garish carpets on the floor that crawled part way up the walls, illuminated by delicate wall sconces. I took a few hesitant steps down the hall, not really sure what I was expecting. With each step I gained more confidence, was more sure that this was going to work. I just needed to break out of the bubble. I broke out into a trot, and then started running down the hall. The bank of elevators was just around the next corner –

WHACK

I slammed face first into a wall and fell back. I felt the crunch of bone break in my nose, felt the warm blood start pouring out and down my shirt. Through tear-filled eyes I looked up, there wasn’t a wall there. just the empty hallway. I reached out my foot and pushed it against something hard and invisible. The bubble had me locked in. I was trapped.

My head was spinning from the impact. The world was spinning around me with both the impact and the realization that I might actually be trapped. I laid my head down and passed out.

“Surprise!” They pulled off the blindfold.

It didn’t matter anymore, I was stuck here. The party was my life now. I found Erik’s brother who asked me, again, about my chugging ability. “Fuck chugging one beer, let’s see how fast we can chug three.” I laid all three out in glasses and they waited for the carbonation to settle. “So your brother Erik, he’s a weird guy eh? Did he really kill a man in the forest?” The brother seemed taken aback by it. “Oh you don’t know that story? I haven’t heard it from him but that’s what the rumour mill produced. Let’s do some shots between these beers.” I proceeded to chug the three beers, swigging from a bottle of Jameson between each one. The other guys had just finished their first by the time I was finished.

It hit me hard.

I ran into Andy who reached for a hug. “I’ve got some exciting news,” she told me.

“I’m sure you do, but guess what, it doesn’t matter.” I leaned in like I was revealing a secret. “None of it matters.”

“What are you talking about?”

“This is it, the only night we have. What happened before, what happens after, what happens tonight, it doesn’t matter. Like a puff of smoke it’ll all go up and disappear from our minds. All we have is this instant right now.” I was swigging from a bottle like it was water.

“You’re a real asshole sometimes you know that?” She walked off angry.

It didn’t matter. I finished the bottle, found another group of people with more alcohol and kept going. I kept drinking until I blacked out.

“Surprise!” I yelled as I pulled off my blindfold.

I hunted out Erik’s brother, somehow he had become a staple for the beginning of the party. “Hey man, I heard you have quite the chugging skills.”

“You have no idea,” I said as I filled a pint glass with whisky. “Fancy a competition?” I didn’t wait for them to answer, instead once the glass was full I chugged it down, smashed the glass on the floor, and punch one of his friends. “Ha! Now that’s how you chug.”

The whisky hit my head and I blacked out.

“Surprise! Let’s get this party started!”

I didn’t drink this time. Instead I started picking up furniture and smashing it. A couple of chairs, a side table, lay splintered on the floor. The music had stopped, everyone was standing and watching me with concern as I laughed maniacally and continued my destruction. Andy grabbed me at one point and tried to pull me away. “What are you doing Ross? You’re scaring people.”

“Nothing to be scared of, just having some good ol’ fun. Don’t you remember that bush party we went to where we burned that bench?”

“That was a long time ago, you don’t party like that anymore.”

“Tonight I do.” I looked at all the broken furniture and debris around me. “All this garbage is starting to clutter up the place, maybe we should throw it off the balcony.”

I gathered up some of the broken furniture and brought it outside. “Hey dude, is everything all right?” someone stopped me at the door.

“I’m about to throw a bunch of debris off the twenty-fourth floor balcony, and you’re asking if everything is all right?” I laughed. “Of course not, now get out of my way or you’re going with it.”

I started hucking pieces of furniture and cheap plastic side tables off of the balcony, betting people on what they thought would travel the farthest. Most were sulking away and leaving by this point. “Well, that’s about all of it,” I said to the few people who had stayed. “I guess there’s only one piece of garbage left.” I jumped up on the ledge of the balcony and looked down. Could this be it, could this work?

“Ross, what the fuck are you doing?”

I turned around and Andy was standing there amongst the splinters of wood. “Oh, hey Andy, back for the rest of the show? Like I said, getting rid of some trash.”

“Seriously, what’s going on? This isn’t like you.” She stepped closer and I backed up, one foot dangling off the edge. “We’ve been friends for decades, you can talk to me. Why don’t you come down from there.”

“You know what, I think you’re right. It’s time I got down.” I faked a step forward, and leaned back off the edge. I watched the balcony get smaller and smaller, the air rushing passed me. I couldn’t see the ground racing to meet me. There was an instant of impact, and then black.

“Surprise!”

It didn’t work. Nothing worked. This was it, this was my life now. I was tired.

I took it calm this time, played the role of surprised guest. I took a couple of shots with people, showed Erik’s brother how to chug a beer; did a round of hugs and cheers and hi-fives.

I had been running this gamut I didn’t know how many times now. Each time I started fresh, my body cleansed of alcohol, sober. It was my mind that was getting exhausted. I was starting to feel like I couldn’t have a moment of rest. There was only ever a split second at the end of the night, between the end and the next party. I just needed a few moments of peace.

I stashed myself away in the bathroom to hide from the mass of people and give myself some quiet. Maybe I could take a nap here, maybe that would help.

I stationed myself in the empty bathtub. Some people tried to come in but I acted belligerently drunk and threw empty cans at them to chase them away. I closed my eyes to rest some more. One person got through. Andy came through the door and pushed passed my act. “What’s going on here, what are you doing in the bathtub? Are you too drunk? Do you want to throw up and eat some bread, would that help?”

“Oh Andy, I didn’t realize it was you. No I’m good, just trying to keep people out. I’m feeling exhausted from the party and needed to be alone for a while. You can stay though, I know you’ve got some news to tell me.”

She was almost giddy with excitement. “How’d you know? Well I was going to save it for later, after the party, but I guess now is as good a time as any. I’ve met someone.”

“No way, that’s awesome. That’s the big news? Who is it?”

“No, well sort of. We’ve been dating a couple of months, that point where things get a little more serious, and I…well…” she was holding back, like she was afraid to tell me. She took a deep breath. “I think I want to introduce her to my family.”

“Oh…Oh!”

“But how are my parents going to react? I don’t know, maybe it’s stupid. Maybe I shouldn’t do it, it’s a little early to tell anyway. It doesn’t matter.”

“Surprise!”

I ran the gamut again, not bulldozing through as I had in the past, but taking my time to say hi to everyone, thank them for coming. I drank a few beers and gave a lot more hugs than hi-fives this time around. Is this how it could be every time? Is this what every party could have been? After chugging the beer with Erik’s brother I met Andy in the middle of the party. She hugged me and wished me luck, told me that she wanted to talk to me later.

“I’m not doing anything right now, why don’t we go find somewhere quiet?”

“Not now, you’ve got a party to…party. People to meet, shot to take; have you seen Ben yet he seemed to have something exciting for you planned. He’s been hinting at it all week.”

I winced at the name. “No, haven’t seen him yet. But you’re one of my best friends. This party will still be here when we’re feeling it. The party will always be here, let’s go talk.” I lead her to the bathroom.

“Really, this is where you want to talk?”

“Trust me, I’ve been over this whole place already. This is about the only room with any sort of privacy in it.” I sat down on the floor with my back against the door while she sat on the edge of the tub. “You know, I’ve noticed a change in you recently. You seem happier than you’ve been in a while. Not that you weren’t happy before, but there’s a giddiness about you, you’re smiling more.”

She blushed a little at the thought. “Well that’s one of the things that I wanted to talk to you about. I’ve actually been seeing someone the past few months. Casually at first, but it’s become more serious the last month and a half.”

“I knew there was something. Well come on, tell me about them, what’s their name? Do I know them?”

“No you don’t know them, they go to a different school,” I smirked at the joke. “But really though, they do. She does. Her name’s Sarah.”

“That’s amazing, tell me more. What’s she like, what does she do?”

We talked for another hour as Andy gushed about this new woman in her life, and the night walks they’ve been taking, and cute dates that she’s planned for them. “We’re talking about going to the drive-in next week. Her father has a station wagon so we can park it backwards and cozy up in the back with a bunch of blankets.”

“That’s great, I’m really happy for you.”

“The only thing is, I’m at that point where I want to introduce her to my family, but I don’t really know how they’ll react. I don’t think they’ll hate her, or me, or anything – I don’t think. It’s just, we’ve never talked about any of that stuff before. We’ve always sort of danced around the fact that I’m gay, but they’ve never had to actually witness it or anything like that. I’ve never brought anyone home before. I’m nervous.”

“I’m sure your parents will be fine. The important thing is that you have to do right by you, and whatever makes you happy. I’ll always be here for you if you need me. Maybe not physically for the next few months. But you know what I mean. And if Sarah is half as great as you say she is, your parents are going to love her too.”

“Can you believe this shit? Who would have thought ten years ago that we’d be here now?”

“Surprise!”

I was making my way through the party again, looking for Andy, but I noticed a distinct change in the atmosphere. When I would make a run through before everyone was excited; yelling, chanting, offering beers and shots, making sure I got good and drunk, even if I didn’t want to. The music was cranked up, and I couldn’t walk five feet without someone yelling in my face. Now the music was turned down to a reasonable volume, people would cheers me as I walked by, but they weren’t trying to pour shots down my throat. I ran into Erik’s brother but he didn’t seem interested in a chugging demonstration. No one could explain it, they had been raring to go, amped before the party, but now they felt tired and drained. Like they’d rather stay in and get a nights rest.

I had noticed it in myself earlier, the never ending party without rest was affecting my mind. I knew why, or suspected, but no one else could explain it so maybe it took longer to affect them. It was starting to affect them though, they had no rest and weren’t eager to carry on.

I found Andy and we went to the washroom. She told me about Sarah and I told her how happy I was for her that she had found someone. “Are you okay,” I asked her. “You’re telling me all this exciting news, but you don’t seem that excited about it.”

“I don’t know,” she played with a bottle in her hand, tilting it and rolling it along the tile floor. “Just tired I guess. Feel a little run down actually, like I haven’t slept in a while.”

“A lot of people seem that way tonight.” This wasn’t a good sign, things were changing. This wasn’t the never-ending-party that Ben had envisioned. “I don’t know, maybe we’re finally getting too old for this kind of stuff.”

“Ha, yeah maybe.”

“Surprise!” Even the surprise was becoming lackluster. A few people yelled out, most gave a half-hearted “whoop” and called it a day.

I got to the bathroom with Andy again and she was telling me about Sarah when there was a banging on the door. “Ross! Hey Ross what are you doing? Are you avoiding me?”

“Is that Ben?” Andy asked. “Have you not seen him yet?”

I got up from the floor and opened the door. “You got me Ben, yes I’ve been avoiding you.”

“What the hell man? This is it, this was supposed to be our time! This is the never-ending party that we’ve always dreamed of. Now come on, let’s get you some shots.” He turned and walked back into the main room.

I followed him, with Andy close behind. “What the hell are you talking about? I never asked for this, I never wanted this. This was all for you. You can’t handle the fact that I was getting ready to leave, that things were changing, and you wanted to keep them the same.”

“What are you talking about man?” Ben turned around with a bottle of whiskey in his hand. “We used to dream about this thing all the time. Don’t you remember all those drunken nights at the end of the party, the two of us passing a bottle back and forth and talking about the future. How much we wished we could hang on to this moment?”

“Yeah, ten years ago when I was riding the high of the party. But things change, people change. And look around you, this party is stagnating and only getting worse.”

“What about that night, back in May-“

He didn’t have a chance to finish the sentence as I swung a fist and caught him in the mouth. “I told you never to bring up that night again.”

A bit of blood trickled down from his split lip. He tasted it with his tongue and spit it out. “I did this for you, sacrificed for you, so why won’t you be grateful!” He hit me over the head with the bottle of whisky and everything went black.

“Surprise,” one person said as the blindfold came off. Everyone else sat around with half filled bottles in their hands, staring morosely at the ground, avoiding eye contact with each other, or passing out on couches and chairs. I wasn’t sure how many more parties these people had left in them, or what would happen once they ran out. But I had an idea now.

First things first, I grabbed Andy and pulled her into the bathroom. “Look, I don’t have a lot of time so I want to get some things out. You’re one of my best friends, and I’ll always love you. I know you’ve met someone – no, don’t bother asking how, I don’t have a lot of time. Just know that I know. And I know that her name is Sarah, and that she sounds adorable, and that you two sound really cute together. If you care about her, and want her to meet your parents, then I think you should do it. You need to live your life. And if they love you they’ll support you in that. Just know that no matter what happens tonight, I’m a better man because of you, and I hope you can pass that on to other people as well.”

I gave her a final hug, one that lingered, that I didn’t want to let go of. But I knew I had to. I had an idea to get these people out of here.

I met Ben on the balcony. “There you are, have you finally come to your senses? Let’s get this party started.” He pulled out a bottle of champagne and popped the cork. “I wish I could say that I’ve been saving this for a special occasion, but I’ve drunk this bottle I don’t know how many times now. It’s good though, you’ll like it.” He poured a glass and handed it to me. “Just like that time back in May when –“

“I’m going to stop you right there,” I took a swig of the champagne and threw the cup down. “These people are withering, our friends are fading away. This can’t go on any longer, this isn’t going to be the party you want it to be. But if you won’t stop it than I will.”

“Oh I’m sure they’ll rally soon. We just need to get the right tunes playing. Give us a couple more parties and you and I will find the right combination to get them going again. Maybe toss in a few Jager bombs for good measure. It’ll be great.”

I ignored him and kept going. “You said you need a sacrifice in order to make the spell or whatever work. Well before I was always looking to get myself out of here alive, trying any way that I could, but it never worked. Well this time I don’t plan on making it through, not if it means everyone else can get out.” I moved to the edge of the balcony and looked over.

Ben laughed. “It doesn’t matter Ross, that’s only one part of it. There’s more that you’re forgetting.” I began reciting the spell, I had overheard Ben say it numerous times already. “Doesn’t matter, I still don’t think it’s going to work,” Ben continued. He wasn’t so sure now though.

“There’s only one way to find out.” I finished the incantation and stepped over the edge.